Depend less. Independ more.
For some reason this week I've been drawn toward watching dark, violent films. Films that I hope will leave me thinking or stun me for a couple days but, so far, I've been disappointed, depressed and plagued with nightmares about my lovah leaving me for one of his ex-lovahs. I had this awful one last night; I was crying so hard in my dream I couldn't even get any tears out; my face was frozen into an anguished expression and I was moaning. I woke myself up and found that I was, in fact, making a disturbing whimpering noise. The dream has left me on the verge of tears all day and what makes matters worse is that I went and expressed to my lovah that I thought I was experiencing feelings of distrust and now we're in a huge, unnecessary fight. Brilliant.
I watched 'Apocalypto' and rented 'Mean Creek' and 'The City of God' over the last 2 days and I don't think I can say I enjoyed either one. I was impressed with performances but I just wasn't..... happy...or glad to have seen them. But maybe that was the point?
Do you ever think when you watch a movie with someone you are close to, that you are almost watching it through their eyes? You think about what they might be thinking about the film and from your knowledge of their likes/dislikes/moral beliefs etc. you stop watching the movie with your own eyes and take on a whole different view and end up disliking a movie because of it?
I think I do that sometimes.
I think I like watching movies on my own.
Am I really that far gone from my own independence? Scary thought.
posted by The ArtofBeingMe @ 9:23 PM
4 Comments:
I don't get that. I never think about the person sitting next to me when I watch a movie, and I wish they would pay me the same respect. I hate when people try to bring me into their movie watching experience because I want to have my own.
Have we ever watched a movie together? I can't recall us doing so. Except for our own home movies.
well, even so, watching a movie with you wouldn't be like that. we both hate people who talk through films, right? we'd be entirely immersed into our own viewings.
I totally do that. I can hate a movie with one person and adore it with another. It does show a little lack of independance I suppose...but I like it that way. Because if you like a movie with someone, it's more good things in your head. If you dislike a movie with someone, it's something you have in common and can talk about it together and bash it. I like watching movies.
i like the title of this blog.
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